I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
