yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
