More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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