Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Randomize