fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
