Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
