I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
