I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
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