I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
