this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
