He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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