is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
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