He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
