I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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