you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
