he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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