Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
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