Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
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