Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
