Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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