You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Randomize
