I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
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