We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Randomize
