You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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