Is it normal to miss your booty call?
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
