he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Randomize
