Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
My dick has a subreddit
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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