Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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