I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
