if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
