In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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