I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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