someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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