R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Randomize
