I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Randomize
