Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
I love you. Go after that dick
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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