her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
