is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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