Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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