WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
