I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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