let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
