what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Someone came in the potted fern
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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