Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
