dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
We need a shit load of segways right now
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
