these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Just cropdusted the office
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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