This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Randomize
