Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I've blown a few things in my day
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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