your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I faked an abortion last night.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
