If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
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